Happy

It always bugs me when people say to me, "Oh come on, just be happy",  "Happiness is a choice and you're not choosing it." I completely understand the challenge it can be to be happy especially with the trials of this live and after experiencing sexual abuse.  Sometimes the effects of the abuse are so overwhelming it is all you can think about.  You are triggered at nearly everything and your emotions are on edge.  BUT what I do want to say is it is still possible to be happy amongst the hell you might be going through or have experienced. 

Sometime I have to mentally check out of my life for a few minutes and do something that typically brings me happiness, even if it is only temporary.  At times I also feel guilty for being happy and ask myself, "How can I be happy after what I've been through?"  Your abuser may have add to those feelings of shame as well. Regardless, I want to give you permission today to take a few minutes and do whatever you can to be happy.  For some of you this may feel nearly impossible, I understand.  Our Father in Heaven wants us to be happy.  If you are finding this to be impossible or difficult He will help you as you work on it.

"Heavenly Father desires that we find true, lasting happiness. Our happiness is the design of all the blessings He gives us—gospel teachings, commandments, priesthood ordinances, family relationships, prophets, temples, the beauties of creation, and even the opportunity to experience adversity. His plan for our salvation is often called “the great plan of happiness” (Alma 42:8). He sent His Beloved Son to carry out the Atonement so we can be happy in this life and receive a fulness of joy in the eternities." Happiness

I've had moments were I felt I was completely left alone and my fate in life was to rot away in misery.  I questioned why I wasn't receiving any help from above.  Why was I being left alone? Why wasn't this pain and sorrow being taken from me?  As I struggled with not receiving relief and feeling my Heavenly Father had left me alone and I was being ignored I learned how to find happiness and relief. I remember expressing those feelings to my counselor who then asked, "Why do you think Heavenly Father hasn't given you relief?  You know He is capable of it and have felt it before." In those moments I had to dig even deeper than before and learned vital lessons I wouldn't have if everything was taken care of for me.  Looking back I can say that was what I needed but I still cannot say I am grateful for what I went through. 

Hopefully this song will bring you some happiness today.  I love watching people enjoy life, let go, and dance.  As I see others that are happy and enjoying life it has liberated me to feel like I can do the same.

"Happy"

It might seem crazy what I’m about to say
Sunshine she’s here, you can take a break
I’m a hot air balloon that could go to space
With the air, like I don’t care baby by the way

Because I’m happy
Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof
Because I’m happy
Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth
Because I’m happy
Clap along if you know what happiness is to you
Because I’m happy
Clap along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do

Here come bad news talking this and that, yeah,
Well, give me all you got, and don’t hold it back, yeah,
Well, I should probably warn you I’ll be just fine, yeah,
No offense to you, don’t waste your time
Here’s why

Hey, come on

Bring me down
Can't nothing bring me down
My level's too high
Bring me down
Can't nothing bring me down
I said (let me tell you now)
Bring me down
Can't nothing bring me down
My level's too high
Bring me down
Can't nothing bring me down
I said

Hey, come on

Bring me down… can’t nothing…
Bring me down… my level's too high…
Bring me down… can’t nothing…
Bring me down, I said (let me tell you now)

Come on